As most of you may know, I was supposed to be returning to the USA today from my mission trip. However, if you haven't guessed it from the title, I had a major anxiety attack and was unable to go.
The day started pretty good, but my nerves were not being nice!! When my family and I finally got to ATL, I was upset and happy at the same time. Then the time came when I had to say goodbye for now and see you in a few weeks to my family. I was super nervous, but I was OK as long as I stayed occupied.
Then we went to the airport and it began! I was feeling nauseous and like Jello. I assume my facial expressions were showing my fear because everyone that pasted me, asked if I was ok. When we finally got through security and to our terminal, I eventually broke down! I started crying Uncontrollably, along with the nauseous feeling and Jello body, but I felt even weaker! I stood up from my chair and started seeing things turn to black, but I'm so glad I didn't black out fully!! Then I was physically unable to board the plane. A very nice woman who worked with Delta, Brenda, pushed me in a wheel chair half way back to the pick up area, and then we walked the rest of the way because I couldn't do the elevator at that time or my attack might come back because I was starting to feel it again. I would rather had risked falling down the escalator at that point, than get in that tiny elevator!!!! Brenda kindly finished walking me and gave me her number in case I needed her until my mom got back because it was a long drive, and she didn't arrive at the airport to pick me up until 2am! Brenda also offered to stay with me, but she was getting off work and I didn't want to trouble her anymore! I could never thank her enough for the way she treated me! The other Delta employees around the area were also very nice and took great care of me while I was waiting!
I'm going to practice flying before next year, but I will try this same mission trip again next year! In the past few weeks I keep seeing things that remind me of the trip and I know I'm supposed to go!